by Peter Murphy
When a conversation is not working out there is
the potential for massive frustration or a breakthrough depending
on how you look at it.
-
Question your assumptions about the other person
Perhaps the breakdown in communication is based on rumors that
have no basis in reality. You may be unfairly judging the other
person and filtering every word he speaks because of a false image
of who he really is.
Have you ever harshly judged someone and found out later you were
completely in the wrong? Make sure you are not making the same
mistake again.
- Ask
for clarification
Ask the other person to fill in the gaps that are causing you
to lose your grasp on the train of thought.
Asking questions demonstrates your interest in a positive outcome
and is to be encouraged. Never worry about looking stupid for
asking for more information. The smartest people value information
and are always ready to ask for more.
-
Are you really listening?
Check that you are really paying attention and not just pretending
to be. Change your posture, pay close attention to how the other
person is talking and demand more of yourself.
Become more attentive simply by choosing to be.
- Address
the issue directly
Be direct and say aloud that you feel the conversation is not
working out. Often the other person will agree and together the
two of you will be able to work to correct the situation.
Two minds are better than one!
-
Ask for help
If you often have trouble conversing with a particular person
get advice from someone that knows the other person. Very often
by doing this you will get new insights you can act on right away.
And someone who is removed from the situation will have the objectivity
you need to make sense of the chaos you have created.
-
Take a break
Sometimes the timing just is not right. Reschedule the conversation
for a later time when you are better prepared, more rested or
not as distracted by other issues.
Forcing something to work out when the odds are stacked against
you is difficult and often unnecessary. Get back to it later when
you are feeling more capable and you will make better decisions
and with less effort.
-
Aim for good not perfect
Sometimes we hold such high standards for ourselves that we can
never win. If you demand 100 per cent success at all times you
are setting yourself up for constant disappointment. Do your best
and aim to learn and improve from every experience.
Be kinder to yourself and you will be more relaxed in all of your
dealings with other people. And ironically your performance will
improve because you are not being so hard on yourself.
Credit:
Peter Murphy recently produced a very popular free report: 10 Simple
Steps to Developing Communication Confidence Apply now because it
is available for a limited time only at: http://www.workwealth.com/charm.htm
Related
Information:
NBA
Benefit Provider - Sprint
NBA
Resource Article - 11
Tips To Guide Your Work Life
NBA
Resource Article - How
to Listen Your Way to More Sales
Reprint of this article does not constitute an
endorsement by the National Business Association; the article is
for informational purposes for our members and viewers of our Web
site.
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